This particular version was adapted from ‘The Hungarian Cinderella Sketch’.  This sketch was written by a group of Cub Leaders for a training weekend as one of the evenings entertainments. I was one of those leaders, and played one of the Ugly Gouchos (formally known as ugly sisters).

This sketch is to be done without any emotion or expression at all. The characters should sit in a row:

Audience
FC C UG DJ CP

Stand slowly and lethargically to say the lines once the person before has sat down.
The sketch should be disjointed but not boring and the audience should be one step ahead of you but don’t give anything away.

NEVER laugh at anything !!!

The Cast in order of Appearance.

CP: Chief Poncho (Narrator)
DJ: Don Juan (Prince Charming)
UG: Ugly Gouchoes (Ugly Sisters)  (As many as you like, we had three)
C: Consuala (Cinderella)
FC: Fairy Cowboy (Fairy Godmother)  – But believe me a Fairy Cowboy made it even funnier.

CP Once upon a time, in the land of never, never and far beyond, just outside Santiago there lived Don Juan, the worlds greatest luuver.
DJ I am Don Juan, the worlds greatest luuver.
CP And there lived the ugly gouchos.
UG We are the ugly gouchos.
CP And the ugly gouchos sister, Consuala.
C I am Consuala.
UG We are so excited, we are going to the Square Dance.
C I am so sad, I am not going to the Square Dance.
UG Consuala, bring us our poncho’s.
C Alright.
UG Consuala, bring us our cowboy boots.
C Alright.
UG Consuala, bring us our glass eyes.
C Alright.
UG We are so excited, we are going to the dance with Don Juan.
C Alright.
UG We are going to the Square Dance now.
C Alright.
UG Consuala, stay here and brand the cows.
C Alright.
CP A little while later.
C I am so sad.
FC Don’t be sad. I am your Fairy Cowboy.
C Oh, you startled me.
FC Why are you sad ?
C I am not going to the Square Dance.
FC Oh yes you are.
C Oh no I’m not.
FC Oh yes you are.
C Alright.
FC I will give you a pretty dress to wear …… ping.
C Oh! It’s beautiful.
FC I will give you some nice chaps to wear …… ping.
C Alright!
FC I will give you some glass ….. cowboy boots to wear …… ping.
C Thank you I am so happy.
FC You can go to the dance now, but you must be back by first light.
C Alright.
CP A little while later at the Square Dance.
DJ I am Don Juan and I am so macho.
C You are so macho.
DJ I know. I am going to dance with you.
C Alright.
UG We are so jealous.
C I am happy.
FC I am the Fairy Cowboy.
(All turn to look at the Fairy Cowboy)
FC Sorry.
CP It was soon first light. The mission bells began to ring …… dong, dong, dong.
C Oh! It’s morning. I must go now.
DJ Alright. (Slightly confused look)
CP She ran away.
C Oh no! I have dropped my glass cowboy boots, but I must go before my nice chaps turn into melons.
CP The next day.
UG We are so jealous.
C I am so sad.
FC I’m the Fairy Cowboy.
(All turn to look at the Fairy Cowboy)
FC Sorry.
CP The Don Juan appeared at the hacenda looking so macho.
DJ I am so macho.
UG You are so macho.
DJ You are so ugly.
UG We know.
DJ I have brought a glass cowboy boot, will you try it on?
UG It fits.
DJ No it doesn’t.
UG Yes it does.
DJ No it doesn’t.
UG Alright.
DJ Will you try the slipper on ?
C Alright.
FC It fits.
C I am so happy.
DJ I am so macho, I am going to marry you.
C Alright.
UG We are jealous.
DJ I am macho.
C I am happy.
FC I am the Fairy Cowboy.
ALL WE KNOW!!!
CP Soon the wedding took place and everyone was invited to a big square dance afterwards.
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